Happy Sunday! Sundays are the day I typically take off, and let me tell you…every single Sunday I have an anxiety attack. I’ve struggled with exercise addiction for the past 2 years and it’s been a bumpy ride to say the least. This past semester, by the grace and strength of God, I experienced so much freedom in that area, but it’s still a daily struggle.
I used to FREAK if I didn’t exercise atleast 30 minutes hardcore in a day. The idea of a “day off” was crazy talk to me because I figured that if I didn’t get a workout in, I’d gain 5 extra pounds along with the 5 other pounds I would gain from eating. And I’m not even exaggerating. I was afraid of food for a long time because I just knew that every time I ate, I was gaining excessive amounts of weight. I found myself blowing off friends and important things just to workout and that’s a huge regret that I have.
As I write that, it sounds stupid even to me. But it was so real and it still is! I know my body needs a break and I know that for me, working out twice a day (or more) 7 days of week will leave me extremely tired, moody, rude, and every other bad quality you can think of. And the more I exercise, the more my mind is focused on that instead of more important things like family, friends, God, school, and things I love to do like cook and read.
Since summer started and I really don’t have much to occupy my mind, I’ve found myself thinking about exercising alot and it’s become more of an obligation than something fun and enjoyable. I’ve been looking at it in the completely wrong way-I want it to change my body instead of just keep me healthy. So, as I woke up I had an itch to go run-not because I wanted to, but because I felt I “had to”. I had to make a choice…to run or not to run? If I had run, I would’ve been trying to control things myself instead of surrendering my body and my trust to God.
I don’t seem to have a hard time trusting God with the rest of my life-like school, the future, whether or not I’ll ever meet a guy (which doesn’t look promising :P) but when it comes to my body, I feel like I have to control it, and that’s so false. On days off, I usually have to pray consistently throughout the day for peace about not exercising and truth-truth that I’m not going to gain 8 pounds when I eat a salad or even a cookie. It’s ridiculous how those lies can totally suck you into themselves and you get so lost you can’t seem to find your way out. But I promise, there is a way out and its SO freeing! I wouldn’t be alive if I hadn’t found and received that freedom from Christ.
So today, whether I gain 3 pounds or not, whether I eat everything I see or not, I’m going to shift my mind to other things. Pursuing my family, spending time with a good book, enjoying the beautiful weather and the wonderful nature that God’s surrounded me with here at home. I’m going to focus on loving and serving people around me. My hope is to pursue health and not the perfect body…just taking care of the body that I’ve been blessed with instead of wishing it looked differently.
Honestly, that’s the reason I started this blog. I wanted to be held accountable not just in eating, but in exercising as well. There’s a fine line between exercising too much and exercising not enough, and I hope to consistently find myself in the middle. I don’t want it to overtake my life again and become a priority over the people in my life or my time with the Lord, but I don’t want to forget about it completely either. As great as it is, there is SO much more to life than the gym!
Here are some articles, scientifically proving that over-excising is NOT good for your body. There is a limit for everyone, and although everyone is different, there is such thing as too much. So take advantage of a break and live life!
Have a relaxing Sunday and I’ll be back later with some eats!