I have been such a snack machine the past few days. Sometimes I think they made the character The Cookie Monster (now the Carrot Monster or something not as fun anymore) just for me.
As a scheduler-and a strict one at that-I tend to eat at roughly the same times everyday. One, because it’s something that hovered over me during my ED days and I can’t seem to get rid of that aspect of control. Two, if I go too long without eating, I feel weak and trust me, I’m a diva when I’m hungry.
One of the best commercials ever made.
Some days I adhere to my schedule and I consider it a “good” day in terms of food. Most days though, I stray. I snack alot (especially when I’m at home for hours) on small things here and there, but I get to worrying that the calories add up.
I LOVE the blogging community. Writing is a source of relief and healing for me, but reading other healthy-living blogs has been such a blessing in my life; just to know that other girls have gone through similar things when I thought I was the only one has provided enough healing in itself.
My favorite thing to read on a blog is the food! Let’s face it…I freaking love food. Even though food and I have had our ups and downs, ohmygosh I’m the posterchild for “living to eat” instead of “eating to live”. Just like I compare myself to every other person in every other way, I realized today that I compare what I eat to other bloggers. Not necessarily to lift myself up or shoot myself down, but just to know that I’m eating “enough” and the “right” stuff.
As I shoveled handfuls of cereal and whole-wheat Saltines in my mouth all morning as I unpacked our condo, all I could think of was “MAN other bloggers are NOT eating right now, they’re NOT eating as much as me, blah blah blah”. Thankfully, it was a short spell and instead of beating myself up over it, I accepted it and moved on. If I’m the blogger that eats the most, then I’m the blogger that eats the most!
It was such a good reminder to myself that I am my own person. I have a different body with different needs, a different metabolism, a different setup than every single other person on the planet. There’s absolutely no way-zero, zip, nada-that I’m going to stop reading food blogs because of that. It’s just important to keep in mind your own needs. And if you eat when nobody else is, or if you eat more than what is posted on another’s blog, who caresssss!?!?
Happiness cannot depend on our comparison to others’ food ventures. We are all made uniquely and real talk, we aren’t in control of our stomachs. 😉