Thanks Matilda

As if there haven’t been enough loaves in my life lately…

Healthified Chocolate Cake

Adapted from VegWeb *for all you Veganers out there*

1 2/3 cups flour (I used 1 cup white, 2/3 cup whole-wheat)
1 cup sugar
1/3 cup cocoa (Hershey’s Special Dark)
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1/2 cup applesauce
1 cup unsweetened chocolate almond milk
2 egg substitutes

Mix dry ingredients together.  Mix in wet ingredients, but make sure you don’t overmix!

Pour batter into a greased loaf pan and bake for ~50 minutes at 350*F.

I won’t lie, cake is NOT a favorite dessert of mine.  Want to know why?  Matilda.  Watching a 6-year old boy eat a friggin 9 pound cake made me want to vomit and to this day, chocolate cake holds a bad rap in my heart.  But…what do ya know…a chocolate cake is what resulted from tonight’s baking adventures.  (How are my Saturday nights so so exciting?)



I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again-when the little stresses and problems in life get to my, my first instinct is to turn to either severely controlling what goes into my body, or not giving a rat’s booty and shoving food in faster than I can swallow.  Lately, there’s been a lot of “little” stressors that lead me to that stupid fork in the road: give into the little voices or turn to Jesus-the main man who saved me from all of the pain in this world?

No counseling, no medicine, no diet plans healed me from disordered eating.  God really is the only reason I’m alive and thriving today.  It was as simple (okay not so simple) as turning my focus away from myself and turning towards the Creator of the universe and the price he paid to save my little ol’ measly life.


Relationships have been the main perpetrator in all these little things getting to me.  I realize how every single person is going to fail me at one point or another, which is hard for me to stomach.  But God is always always always waiting for us to run back to Him.  Even though I’ve ignored him pretty much all summer and have been overly focused on myself, He’ll still take me back and love me regardless!

So so awesome.  That security has been the biggest comfort in the past year as I’ve struggled to recover and deal with other broken areas of my life because of disordered eating.  Suchhhh a blessing to have that!

“For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves, 14in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.” Colossians 1:13-14

Sorry for the randomness!  Enjoy this beautiful Sunday!


What’s your favorite kind of cake?

How do you cope with the little issues in life?



Filed under Baking, ED thoughs

6 responses to “Thanks Matilda

  1. #1 That cake looks really delicious
    #2 I used to get totally creeped out by that scene in Matilda too haha
    #3 “No counseling, no medicine, no diet plans healed me from disordered eating. God really is the only reason I’m alive and thriving today.” Me too girl. It’s incredible to see your love of God in every post and I know we can beat up that old ED mindset in time with His help. I’m so glad to be able to know you as a sister in Christ! 🙂

  2. Oh man I forgot about that scene from Matilda. Now I’m grossed out again! Your cake does look good though. 🙂

  3. It’s great that He was able to help you in your recovery 🙂 I’m still finding Him but I know He’s there.
    Your cake looks absolutely delicious! I’m not a huge fan of cakes either. I actually don’t know what kind of dessert I like anymore. I just like sweet food in general 😀

  4. First of all, fabulous looking cake there.. a must try for me 🙂
    And second, I am so glad you have found recovery through God. I don’t exactly know what my religious views are but I am actively searching… this was inspiring for me to read

  5. that cake looks awesome!

    i love angel food cake

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